Hi All,

I've had lots of ideas for my first post to this blog, and have consequently written nothing! I will be starting my first quasi-Rife treatment tomorrow (hopefully) and will probably be out of commission for awhile, so I figured I better get something started.

I'll start with something simple; an explanation of the title of the blog. Both a Maple tree and the image of a warrior have become strong healing images for me of late.

When I was a child we had a house in the foothills of the Catskills with a beautiful Maple tree in front. I loved it, and I felt it loved me--unconditionally! I also remember a feeling associated with it of strength through the trunk reaching into the earth and upward to the sky. While this tree is no longer physically in my life, I feel it still, its strength now something inside my body, rather than beside it.

The second image, that of a warrior, depicted here by my mother, is a startling one to me. I confess that almost without knowing it I had infused the challenge of dealing with my health issues with New Age notions such as "make love not war" with the microbial intruders. They must have a lesson for me, for my benefit. Or perhaps God does. Or, if only I could dwell in divine love more perfectly, I would be healed without even the need for medical treatment. I imagine I'm doing some misrepresenting, but these kinds of ideas are common here in Santa Fe, where beliefs about illness and healing crowd every street corner. (And this is only a tiny sampling.) But as something in me has grown stronger, for reasons I may grope at describing in another entry, an energy has grown in my solar plexus that can only be described as that of a warrior. I am "battle-ready".

I have felt conflicted about this! And yet it is so undeniable as to defy argument.

Here's what my dear friend Kathleen, who typed this out for me, had to say re my dilemma: "I think warrior mode is great and we should be out to absolutely get every damn little spirochete we can get our hands on. This is a very spiritual stance."

Here's what Jeannie, another friend and a spiritual teacher said: Warrior is great. Warrior FOR life, for living, for yes!!! Yay! Fierceness of warrior for life is great. If someone was in my house to harm S, it would be love with teeth not love with tea and cookies. It would be, f**k no, a firm, clear refusal to allow harm, but it would not be hey, you're a f***ker. It would be, very clear, there's the door, get out, and bless you on your way. So how does fierceness enter without making anything wrong or bad? Can you say to the spirochetes, thank God for me, and I'm saying, enough, I want to live, I fiercely show you the door.

Roarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Some of you know mountain lions have a special significance for me, since I encountered one and had a ferocious face-off in the wilderness. That’s a story for another day, but it’s a happy coincidence that Jeannie sent me this image.

So perhaps it’s not such a rigid dichotomy as “make love or make war,” but “make love via war,” or “make war with love,” or something more subtle.

Finally, my father has copiously and charmingly indulged another related image, that of a dragon. Here is an example; this one he drew while I was on my first harrowing trial of antibiotics a couple of weeks ago:












It’s been rare and outrageous -- though head-splitting -- fun doing this small creative project of getting this blog going. Perhaps the big new monitor Pop is getting me will help in the future! Please see Mom's post below for more up-to-date medical info. Much love, Molly

From Marilyn--



Dear family and friends,



Molly has been gaining strength physically, thanks to extensive supplements, in part making up the deficits in vitamins, minerals, etc. caused by the Lyme disease itself. She has been greatly helped in this by applied kinesiologist Dr. Tom Rogowskey, who pays weekly housecalls. His muscle-tests with her help determine the correct supplementation.



At the same time, neurological aspects of the disease have worsened: stinging of the skin all over, some dysregulation of thinking and mood, but most especially extreme hyperacusis (severe sensitivity to stimulation, especially sound). Dr. Susser, our Lyme expert with 40 years experience, located in Scottsdale, says that Molly's is is the worst case of hyperacusis he and his expert colleagues who specialize in hyperacusis have ever heard of. It has increased her isolation from friends; now even a few minutes of interaction can cause severe head pain for hours or even days. This (not to mention limitations on occupying herself) has affected her morale. Dr. Susser believes that the neurological symptoms now constitute an organic brain syndrome, probably the result of demylinization–-the loss of nerve insulation. He firmly believes the symptoms can be reversed, however, with the help of new, experimental, unconventional treatments.


Addressing the disease itself–destroying the dastardly and wily spirochetes (bacteria) in all their four guises/disguises–has become a pressing need and is a key part of addressing the neurological problems. Now that she is somewhat physically prepared, we have begun to try a variety of approaches in order to keep the bacteria off-balance, including antibiotics, herbs and a current version of the Rife machine.

 Besides herbs, she just recently she undertook her first antibiotics, two in tandem, to address all 4 forms of spiros at once. As expected, it was something of a drama, as the expiring spiros released new toxins causing a worsening of her usual symptoms and significant emotional upheaval. The body had to bind and get rid of the new toxins. There’s no way around this die-off reaction–called the Jarisch-Herxheimer reaction or herx for short--though it can be softened with certain supplements.

Another part of the treatment equation involves breaking down the "biofilm," which is a kind of plaque-like material in which the spirochetes shield themselves and attack the nervous system. At the same time the nerve sheaths need help to reconstitute (re-myelinize) themselves. This is all new research territory.

At this crucial stage on the long road of healing–when Molly has now been house-bound for a whole year!-- I know she would be deeply appreciative of your renewed prayers, chanting, meditation or "sits" with her, as well as e-mails and photos. 



Marilyn